What I am absolutely fascinated with is the transition from summer to winter through that season called fall. While I have been out riding and running I have particularly noticed the leaves fall. I am sure that everyone has heard that to catch a falling leaf is lucky. I often wonder about these falling leaves and think about them as a metaphor for opportunities. 

Imagine that leaves represent opportunities. Leaves are more abundant at certain times of the year, as are opportunities. Now imagine that you were walking in the fall and see all of the leaves falling from the trees and landing on the ground. They may represent opportunities all around you. If you are not paying attention to them, they go unnoticed and pass you by. Now imagine you are alert to the many leaves or opportunities that come your way, you are much more likely to catch one spontaneously. Also, imagine that none of the leaves are coming your way and you are having a hard time grasping one. It sometimes seems the harder you try, the more difficult it becomes to catch one of these leaves. I have tried this while running once. I looked absolutely ridiculous, trying with all of my might, my arms extended, bringing them together, and still missing the leaf. Perhaps the timing or placement wasn`t quite right which the same can be said for opportunities. Another time I went running and a leaf hit me and I managed to catch it without trying. I suppose that is luck.

Does a leaf need to fall from the tree and be caught before it hits the ground to be considered lucky. Occasionally, a truck will drive by and if it is a dry day, the leaves will lift back and present themselves as new falling leaves. This is equivalent to an old opportunity or idea that reappears like a new one.  Would it be any less lucky to catch one of those leaves or less beneficial to take advantage of an old opportunity? Let’s consider this leaf metaphor further, would there be anything wrong with bending over and picking up a leaf that no one else has caught? Perhaps that could be related to accepting opportunities that appear to below you or perhaps you are the only one that sees the advantage of a recycled opportunity. Like leaves, opportunities are what you make of them. What do falling leaves mean to you?

Belinda Kissack is a Registered Clinical Counsellor and a Canadian Certified Counsellor who works in the Cowichan Valley who coaches and counsels individuals and couples on a variety of topics including  Self-Esteem, Confidence, Relationships, Self-Care, Stress Management, Conflict Resolution. Please call her at 250-710-9972 to book a free consultation.

Do you ever wonder what to do when people give you negative feedback? A hypnotherapy technique I use is called transmutation. That involves taking negative feedback and instead of merely letting it bounce off of you, you take the energy from the feedback and change it into a way that energizes you instead. When I first announced that I was planning to tackle this challenge a few people who are close to me said “You can`t do that!“ I wondered if it was because I was attempting to take on a role that I ordinarily wouldn`t take on or whether they believed that I had physical limitations, or dare I say it, that I might possibly be too old. They may be right for all I know, but I decided I wouldn`t let them be the ones to make my decision whether or not to attempt the challenge. We`ll know in about 11 months and 3 weeks who was right. Back to transmutation. Whenever I met with unhelpful responses, I listened to the concerns, and made them positive. I agreed, I that I hadn’t done this race before, I don’t know how my body will respond to the training or the race itself, but neither did many other people who managed this feat before they did it.  In fact, I have much more training, experience, and awareness of the race than many other people had before they signed up. So, I take the negative comments, educate myself more about what I need to learn, I look for ways to find evidence that contradicts what they have said, and then to myself, I thank them for their concern and the energy they have expended on my challenge and use that energy to fuel myself and make myself a better racer. Now I didn’t get to mention all of the positive responses I have received since signing up for Ironman. There have been plenty and I am thankful that there are so many positive people who support other people tackling challenges.

What sort of challenges have you taken on and have you been discouraged by people in your social network? What do you do to follow through with your dreams?

Belinda Kissack M.A. is a registered clinical counsellor and a clinical hypnotherapist who works with individuals, couples and families. When she is away from the office you can often spot her running (or walking as the distances are getting longer),  cycling (or stretching…ditto) or swimming in the local lakes in and around the Cowichan Valley.

Belinda Kissack M.A. is a Registered Clinical Counsellor and offers counselling to individuals and couples in Duncan, British Columbia. When she is away from the office, she can be found riding the country roads of the Cowichan Valley, contemplating her next physical challenge.

Later that same day, I also put some more thought into what attracts me to the races. Then I met up with some of the people I know around town who set themselves challenges that they never thought they could accomplish: Swimming in a race, being in the open water, wearing a tight swimsuit or racing suit in public, getting on a bike, then running. At triathlon races there is a great diversity of people with life stories about changes and challenges, people who have made major life changes, lost weight, stopped drinking, stopped smoking, found new meaning, and those who are battling physical disabilities or degenerative diseases. I am also inspired and challenged by our notions of aging. While I was racing the Cowichan Challenge I thought about our local celebrity (70+) who competes in this race nearly every year. I thought about her as I was climbing the hills of the run and passing over the stepping stones worrying about my footing and wondered what it was like for her.

The athletes would be enough inspiration for one day, but then there are the volunteers and spectators. The people who selflessly give of themselves to ensure that races go on, keep racers safe, fed and watered. They plan for months, set up the course long before the racers show up, and take it down after the racers have left. There are the spectators who stand there clapping and cheering and sometimes running alongside competitors to capture great photos; family members who are smiling from ear to ear with pride when they watch their loved ones take those enormous steps.

I am glad I was asked the question about what it was about triathlon races that I love. I now know why triathlon has become such a large part of my life.

I was reminded yesterday, how important it is to attempt to see things from someone else’s perspective even when it isn’t at first obvious. While I was riding my bike yesterday a couple of small dogs started to chase me. I wasn’t all that concerned as they were very little dogs and they were not really keeping up with me. However, they ended up in the middle of a fairly quiet secondary road. Within seconds of my passing the small dogs, a driver came from behind and one in front of me. My first instinct was to worry about the small dogs with the two cars coming toward them. So, using hand gestures, I waved to the driver to slow down. Sometimes drivers are not all that curteous to bikers but I hoped that the driver would trust that I requested her to slow down for a good reason and not because I thought she was driving down the country road too quickly. I watched behind me and noticed both cars slowed down for the two dogs to safely get back home.

Sometimes when we`re out on country roads people can become angry with cyclists and sometimes, cyclists with motorists. I wondered how different the scenario would have been if the motorist had thought that I was telling her to slow down because she was going too fast - which I don’t think she was. Or if I had given the message to someone else who would have interpreted it negatively. Would they have gotten annoyed, sped up and accidently run into one of the dogs? I am grateful that the driver whom I came across yesterday saw my ’slow down’ message and the dogs.

I wonder in life how often we hear messages that are intended to protect other people, animals, or things and are interpreted negatively. When the messages are misread or misinterpreted we can end up straining our relationships and harming those we set out to protect. It’s worth considering when we hear a message, to ask ourselves what the positive intention of the message might be rather than becoming defensive toward the message.  I am happy that the driver considered my perspective and slowed down. Now I just have to ride past the dogs about five more times before my upcoming qualicum triathlon.

Belinda Kissack, M.A. is a Registered Clinical Counsellor working in the Cowichan Valley and in her free time trains for running races and triathlons.

I am happy to say that I ran my marthon last week and survived. I was very happy with my results as well. We had fantastic weather and a very flat course. There were camber issues at mile 13 which resulted in a sore IT band for me. I finally found the muscle causing the cramp 4 miles later and was then able to massage it intermittently. At mile 19 there were oysters to sample which I decided to try. I had been suffering from a lack of salt and reasoned that the oysters and cocktail sauce would likely help out my twitching muscles. The formula was perfect, until i had another sip of water which threw off my body chemistry again. I have learned from others that when the muscles on the verge of cramping to slow down which i did. I managed to stick to my 9 and 1 minute run and walk breaks. However, as I slowed down I only allowed myself to stop once per mile which was more like a 12 and 1. But that’s okay. I was happy to persevere and felt confident given the little amount of training that I did. In the weeks leading up to the race, I told myself that I would not do another marathon, but after experiencing perfect race conditions and a great race venue, I just might do another one. But not before I race my sprint triathlon in Qualicum coming up at the end of the month.

Belinda Kissack is a Registered Clinical Counsellor in the Cowichan Valley and trains for running races and triathlons in her free time.